miggyswamp

Isn't it enough?

2011-12-27T07:44:00.001-08:00

A reminder...

2011-03-30T22:08:00.000-07:00

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."

-Dr. Suess

Writing Slump

2011-03-30T20:50:00.000-07:00

When I graduated college, I was thrilled to finally be free.

Not because I wouldn't have to study so god damn much.

Not because I didn't look forward to another semester of repetitive work.

I was thrilled because I wanted to begin writing. Not just the little things that I did throughout college, but really, really write.

And yet, I have now been presented with the wonderful delights of a horrible economy: no job. And it is with no job that I have found my slump.

I have filled out 5 billion resumes/cover letters, each sounding more awesome and sophisticated than the other.

But to my dismay: no hits.

FUCK.

So, after months of trying, moping, and trying and moping some more, I've reached a conclusion: perhaps it's not that I can't write. Perhaps my inability to find a job has made me feel as if I've failed. And perhaps I'm afraid that failure will transfer over to the things I attempt to write.

Even deeper than that, perhaps I am afraid to write what I want to write. Not because I care about what others think, but because I think my ideas are not quite as profound as I believe them to be.

And then I watched this today:

Dammit, now I have to write. And dumb things at that.

On Adulthood

2011-02-22T10:20:00.000-08:00

After growing up, I've learned that there's not much of a transition from childhood to adulthood. We're all just a bunch of kids who became well-practiced at social interaction and have to take 8 hours out of our playtime to earn money.

After the Storm

2010-06-20T15:39:00.000-07:00

Breakfast

2010-06-19T09:59:00.000-07:00

My roommate and I both love cooking, so every once in a while we take a break from our usual speedy college meals and enjoy something a bit more refined. A few weekends ago, I decided to make us breakfast--crepes--and this was the end result.

Not only do they look delicious in the picture, they were also delicious in my mouth.

Can You Feel It?

2010-05-30T22:28:00.000-07:00

The Conundrum (or Lack Thereof) of Libraries

2010-05-24T12:20:00.000-07:00

It was very interesting how I happened upon the realization that I wanted to be a librarian. Ever since I began college--no, even before I began college, I had toyed with several ideas for a future career: physician's assistant, teacher, writer (still a strong desire), archaeologist, psychologist, social worker, international adoption agent, but there was always something that I found within these careers (besides the career of writing) which made my shiny idealism rust over. Though I was excited about learning the content that each of these fields brought forth, once I figured out the actual duties of each job, my idolatry of these careers ran amok. At first I thought it was because I was lazy--I mean really, who wants to work for the sake of working? But then I realized that something was missing underneath all of the idealistic ambition.

Books have always been my passion. Writing has been one of my favorite pasttimes. I consider myself a Miss Frizzle of my generation, emphasizing the power of learning, books, and exploration. I find something deeply moving about the recordation of human knowledge and thought, as well as the accumulation of these works into collections. One of my favorite volunteer experiences was helping a struggling fifth grader not only learn how to read, but come to enjoy reading. This is what was missing from all of my potential career pursuits: a sense of purpose, feeling like I was working for a cause. Certainly I could have found a cause within each potential career path, but none were so prevalent and influential in my life such as my very good friends: books.

I'll never forget the moment several months ago, where I froze (I was at my job in the university library) and had the simple thought of, "Oh!"

That was it. There was no question. I was going to be a librarian, in a way I felt I was meant to be a librarian, and I thought myself rather silly for not realizing it all along.

And then I began to tell other people, and their reaction would ensue as follows: first comes their own, "Oh," and then comes the chuckle or genuine expression of concern, "You want to become a librarian with the age of digitization upon us? With all of the budget cuts and the current economy?"

So here I am, presented with two questions: one of changing technology and the other of the current limitations of our country. Both questions, I will say, are very understandable, for I too wondered about my career choice when I dove into it. But to be perfectly honest, all things I've wanted to pursue as a career since childhood would have me living off of a jar of pennies, so that question is rather irrelevant. I do recognize that current budget cuts are an issue, but fortunately with the impending retirement of baby boomers, I will have plenty opportunities ahead of me.

Then comes the issue of technology. More people are getting into Kindle, Sony Reader, and now, the iPad. More and more books are becoming available electronically. Google Books is revolutionizing the availability of information. No longer do we need to make the trip to the library to check out book upon book. Right?

WRONG! And here's a list of bullet points why:

1. Librarians are information specialists. They know how to conduct good research, they know how to use indexes, and most of all, they know what valid sources are and what they are not. Regardless of technological advances, Librarians will still be needed to archive all information
into digital libraries, and they will also be needed to aid the public in research. Librarians also help community members with resumes and job resources, something in high need at this time with the current economy. In fact, many libraries are reporting an increase in their patron numbers because of this.

2. Libraries are evolving. They certainly aren't going extinct! They are adapting to the needs of the community, and for over the past 50 years, have been focused on becoming a sort of community center rather than just a book warehouse. They provide internet to those who cannot afford it (which has been in even more use in the current job market--people use the library to find jobs), they offer media resources, groups meet to share their common interests and hobbies, special presentations and seminars are given by professionals and speakers to the community's benefit...and with the advancement of technology, imagine how many other resources libraries everywhere will offer!

3. They are going to have to keep that old stuff somewhere. That's right, just like the storage of those precious documents our country was founded upon, it will still be important to retain hard copies of books, articles, periodicals, etc. So, regardless of whether an item is available digitally, it is important that it remain easy for acquisition if needed. I imagine that these libraries would take on a more museum-like atmosphere, kind of like the Library of Alexandria.

4. Libraries are in a lot more places than you would think. Corporations hire librarians to archive their data and company history, museums are basically libraries with both book and objects without a "book" orientation, laboratories need librarians to aid in research and aid in recording and assimilating data, and there are law and medical libraries. In sum, libraries aren't just for school and the community!

5. Libraries of the future will be technological powerhouses. In accordance with the community center theory, libraries can make all sorts of technological gadgets and resources available to the general public: gaming rooms, movie rooms, computer clubs, technological instruction classes, etc.

Now that I've given a broad list of how libraries can continue to grow in the future, I see that there are some current issues that need to be addressed in order for the above to take place. First of all, libraries need to focus more on advertising. One of the greatest mistakes a library can make is remaining silent with the expectation that the community is aware of its existence. For example, I recall two public libraries in my hometown; one was located downtown on Main St. and was a fairly large establishment that many people attended, and on the other side of town there was a small library, mainly focused on childrens' books and materials. I lived in that town for approximately eight years before I realized that there was another library besides the Main St. location. The obvious reason for this is that the little library did not reach out as it should have to the community. So, in order for libraries to remain alive and stand their ground, it is important to make one's presence known. Not only does doing this bring in more patrons, it also gives libraries more of an idea as to what the community needs, and as a result, libraries can adapt and adjust as more technology brings change.

Second of all, libraries cannot be stodgy. In the present trend of rapid change: culturally, ethically, and technologically, the act of being stubborn and inflexible is certainly not the right way to remain a successful organization within the eye of the community. Nor is it the right way to increase funding.

The future of the library is bright and full of promise. As a prevailing place of free thought, learning, and togetherness, if we as a public continue to access these resources and benefits that the library offers us, our communities will continue to flourish in more ways than we ever imagined possible.

Foiled

2010-05-02T15:17:00.001-07:00

I wonder if it is simply coincidence that every time I go out to work on the garden it starts raining?

Perhaps Thursday will prove to be a better gardening day...

Earth Day

2010-04-23T01:23:00.001-07:00

I am having one of those days where all I can do is something serious and thought-provoking. I've done loads of journaling today, I did a little creative writing, and I also went out and took some pictures. I suppose the beginning of this week was rather hectic, so maybe it was my brain telling me that I needed some time to reflect. I usually need a lot of thinking time, for my mind is always busy with some sort of introspection or philosophical thought, and since I didn't get as much time as usual Monday through Wednesday, it was quite ravenous for some contemplation.

I wonder if tomorrow will be the same? I have Fridays off completely, which explains why this post was made in the wee hours of Friday morning.

The forest behind my apartment is teeming with flowers, which made this Earth Day all the more groovy.

And even though it is a weed, I could not forget to photograph a cheerful little dandelion. I really do feel sorry for the lack of appreciation that the dandelion receives. I mean, how can one disapprove of happy, cheery yellow spots all over the lawn...plus, you get to blow the seeds around once the plant matures.

Someday when I have my own yard, I will consider it of the utmost importance that dandelions have a place to flourish. Plus, manicured lawns are dull and I'm too lazy to do the work that goes into the upkeep. I'd rather spend my time doing something more enjoyable...like blowing dandelion seeds everywhere.

Atop a Hill

2010-04-22T20:25:00.000-07:00

Word of the Day...

2010-04-21T08:40:00.000-07:00

I still have yet to figure out why this word decided to haunt my brain...?

Inebriated:

--intoxicated: stupefied or excited by a chemical substance (especially alcohol); "a noisy crowd of intoxicated sailors"; "helplessly inebriated"

Love and Altruism

2010-04-13T14:25:00.000-07:00

Many people believe humans are unique because we have the ability to love and care for others. In fact, love is an incredibly upheld "human experience", one that many of us could not imagine life without.

A lot of people in the world equate love with a superior power, and while I'm not here to prove them wrong, I'm here to argue that love, though a wonderful attribute of our human lives, is not unique simply to us.

Certainly our capabilities of love are enhanced by our large forebrains (the complex thinking and creativity portion of our brain), but love can still be witnessed among other species. Animals, at least social animals, engage in activities such as grooming, cuddling, caring for their young, letting out a warning call to other members of its species even though they may risk their own life doing so, etc. Love is the survival mechanism for most of our planet's creatures. So it's very possible (if not, probable) that love and altruism are no more than biological drives established through evolution in order to aid survival of creatures on this planet.

Is our desire to love and to have love simply a method for reproduction and protection of inner species...and in many cases, species other than our own?

Regardless of this question, I often wonder if love and altruism are replicated throughout the universe on other planets--are there universal means for survival and multiplication, or are there other means of which survival is possible? I cannot imagine a planet full of creatures where it is every furball for itself. This solitary dynamic does exist on our planet (example: Praying Mantis), but cooperation, to an extent, seems necessary, especially in the case of reproduction...even though the female praying mantis devours her mate after copulating, there was still cooperation beforehand. Yep...I just went there.

Anyway, back to the point, it is difficult to imagine a world without love and regard for other living creatures. Would such a thing be possible? All I can imagine without love is death and destruction...unless, of course, a planet relies solely on asexual reproduction.

But the only possibilities we are aware of exist only on this earth, and I think we humans can be biased when imagining other possibilities for it is often from our own experiences that these new possibilities develop. We are bound by our emotions and the logical framework we have gained throughout our evolutionary history, so how are we supposed to imagine another biologically engrained process outside of what we already know is possible?

Perhaps love and altruism are like natural physical laws and patterns: laws that enable life and are spread across the universe.

I recall a philosophical discussion that I had with a group of friends long ago. In this discussion we were speaking about our religious/spiritual/and non-religious beliefs. One of my friends spoke up and said something along the lines of, "For me, love is such a powerful and amazing emotion. Love is such a unique human experience, which makes me believe that there is something out there greater than us all...love proves the existence of a higher power."

I used to share this sentiment when I was younger. I did not necessarily believe in a god, but I thought there was some power or entity that controlled the universe. And love seemed like proof of this supernatural being, and love made humans seem superior to the majority of the planet.

Now, after years of thought and education (and hopefully many more), I've realized that love is not special and unique to just humans; it is everywhere. From the simple smile given to a stranger, to the pouch of a mother kangaroo, love exists in all things. Who are we to think we are any more superior than a ladybug?

And whether or not there is a force that created love and altruism, I can find solace and wonderment in one thought:

Even though the concept of the transcendent may be a human construct, love and kindness enabled me to be here on this planet and is responsible for my opportunity to be composed of these cells, these molecules, and this energy. Even though there is most likely nothing beyond death, the simple opportunity to exist is more precious than the knowledge of what exists after it all ends.

"We find animals doing things that we, in our arrogance, used to think was just human." -Jane Goodall

From a walk...

2010-04-10T20:56:00.000-07:00

Word of the Day

2010-04-07T11:41:00.000-07:00

I often find that one or two non-colloquial words get stuck in my head each day, much like a catchy song that your brain just wants to keep playing over and over again. As a result of this strange occurrence within my brain, I often have to look up the definition of the word in order to clear it from my mind...even if I already know the definition.

I figure after this happening for so many years, I won't need to study the GRE vocabulary section this summer. Okay, so maybe that's stretching things, but it's pretty flipping awesome that I have my own internal Sesame Street up in my head.

On occasion, or perhaps every day, I plan to post my brain's repetitious vocab word--that way the definitions will be further ingrained amidst the memory in my head. Today's word is one that I am already familiar with (by definition number4), but the other definitions were not so apparent to me.

Word of the Day Today: Candor

Merriam Webster's definition:

1 a : whiteness, brilliance b obsolete : unstained purity
2 : freedom from prejudice or malice : fairness
3 archaic : kindliness
4 : unreserved, honest, or sincere expression : forthrightness Aldous Huxley>

Why do humans create?

2010-04-01T10:16:00.000-07:00

Evolutionary Psychology posits that art, literature, and innovation are all means to attract a mate, or to display one's genetic fitness and intellect. Though not a conscious endeavor, could it be that this theory is true? That in all our arrogance and "talents" we only find, on a scientific level, proliferation of human genetic strength?

When I create, it is not necessarily for recognition or to impress others; it is simply an act that I enjoy and find fulfillment in. But are my activities so elusive of a process that my past-times, unbeknownst to me, are my genetic strengths coming forth to exemplify my addition to the future human gene pool?

Regardless of this pondering I find it so beautiful and meaningful that universe, which appears to be heavily barren with rules and patterns, produces molecular structures that can create that which may not have already existed:

Artwork, humor, stories, technology...

"I find it elevating and exhilarating to discover that we live in a universe that permits the evolution of molecular machines as intricate and subtle as we." -Carl Sagan-

Letting go...

2010-03-24T23:13:00.000-07:00

...it's rather terrifying.

But I want to.

It's just a matter of how.

And when.

Life is Beautiful

2010-03-21T08:34:00.001-07:00

Over the years I've come to learn that good events and bad events are relative. If we remove our emotions from the things that happen to us, we would not be able to tell whether they should be labeled as good or bad. Therefore, it makes sense to me that these events become more neutral to us humans if we learn to see how we use our reactions to determine the label of an experienced event.

There have been a lot of events in my life over the past couple of years, and it's through these events that I've been able to see life's occurrences not through labels, but through appreciation that events are meant to happen. Life would not be life without trials and elation.

Without suffering, I would not be who I am today. Without happiness I would not be who I am today. And without the ability humans have to introspect, I most certainly would not be who I am today.

That fact makes life beautiful.

Nature

2010-03-17T17:57:00.000-07:00

Since I was a little girl, I've felt a sense of wholeness by sitting out in the middle of nature. And it only makes sense as it is a return to our natural state; a oneness with the source of our origination. It is so often that we humans get caught up in our own little, imaginary worlds that we forget to return to our true reality.

Last night I sat at the edge of a lake, watching the sun splash into the horizon, sending up a spray of color into the darkening sky. I felt that oneness with all that was around me. I became the trees, the leaves, the scurrying of critters--abandonment of the self.

We humans struggle so much to hold on to who we are, and while who we are is a very important dynamic to the survival within our species, it also contributes to one of our greatest human weaknesses: the ego. Throughout history, humans have seen themselves as above the earth and all that it contains without remembering that the earth will be the very source of our extinction someday if our practices continue as they do. We are at mercy to the planet, and it will only forgive us for so long.

If I were granted one wish, it would be that every single person had the opportunity each day to sit and lose themselves in all that they are and are not. It brings balance, humility, and awareness. It reminds us that we are not who we think we are. And most of all, it reminds us to care for our earth; for caring for our earth is also caring for ourselves.

Inspiration. Connectedness. Beauty.

2010-02-27T10:35:00.000-08:00

Compilation of great, scientific minds transformed into electronica.